Aparna Ganguly
Personality Development – How easy or difficult is it?
Ok Folks, in this article I’ll share my experiences as a Soft skills and Personality Development Trainer while I was working in a Multimedia Education Institution. Initially I had been a Career Advisor under the same brand but a different branch but later I got tired (and bored of counseling) and decided to teach for a change! I observed that I love lecturing and given 1/4th of a chance, I’ll start giving away free advice….which was seldom followed by students or colleagues! Anything given away for free seldom has any value – people start taking it for granted and that is where all problems begin!
So in the very first class I asked them (my students) to introduce themselves and then I asked them what do they understand by the term ‘Personality’.
Some said it is ‘smartness’, some said it is ‘being outspoken’ or ‘being confident’ etc. etc. So I made things easier for them.
I cut the word ‘Personality’ into 2 words – Personal + Qualities – meaning your set of personal qualities make your personality. Simple.
Next question: So why do you think you all are here? To develop your personality … right?
They : Yes Madam!
Me: Any clue as to how you would go about it?
They: [not taking any chances – quietly looking at me…pretty clever]…..
Me: Well…you guys are already 18 plus – having passed your 12th class, some of you are in college final year, some in first year…so do you think your personalities are not developed as yet?! You are full fledged adults – the country is allowing you to vote and decide the future of the nation….and you all are personality-less – is that possible?
They: No Madam.
Me: That also means that you all already have personalities…right?
They : Yes, Madam.
[Things have barely changed you see – I remembered while we were asked questions…we too just stuck to ‘yes sir/madam’ or ‘no sir/madam!]
Me: Then what is there to develop? You already have personalities! Does it not make you wonder why this subject has been added to your syllabus…..what a waste – don’t you all think?
They:[still no reply…they could make out it was a googly question and no one was ready to reply…some were probably also thinking that I was going to call the day off and let them go…..probably hopes were rising for an early day off!!]
Me: Okay tell me some qualities that humans have – let us start with good qualities – each one of you – give me a quality that you think is good and acceptable by all.
They started one by one and I was writing on the white board.
Honest Truthful Loyal Reliable Patient Helpful etc.
Me: Okay how about bad qualities?
I made them say the opposite (since I was also taking their ‘Spoken English’ classes)
Dishonest Liar Disloyal Unreliable Impatient Selfish etc.
Me: So what is it that your want to develop…good qualities or bad qualities?
They: Good qualities!
Me: How and who would know what set of qualities you have in you?
They: People we mix with…parents, relatives, our friends will know.
Me: Ok, let me rephrase – who would best know the set of qualities you possess?
They:… we ourselves..
Me: Correct – each one of you individually will know what is the best positive quality and what is the worst in you – right? So what now? You have agreed that you yourself know your good, bad and ugly traits….so what should be the next step?
They: [silent]
Me: The next step would be to enhance your positive qualities and curb your negative qualities – put a check upon yourself – develop your positive qualities – be a strong positive personality…..and that is it!
In my next article I will write as to how individuals start developing positive or negative qualities…Stay tuned!
Sikander@87
